WebMDave

Stop Lying. Most of What I Call "Reasons" are Just Elegant Excuses I recently read the claim that "Only ten percent of our decisions are truly rational, while ninety percent are rationalizations." The idea didn't come from Facebook or TikTok; it's a popular interpretation of decades of psychological and neuroscientific research on how humans actually make choices. Thinkers such as Nobel laureate Daniel Kahneman and marketing scholar Gerald Zaltman are proponents of this view.  While the percentages may be debatable, the core message is spot on: We mostly feel first, and think second. Remembering this can help me decide , by being more self-aware of how emotional impulses influence my decisions, which is crucial for personal growth.  I need to stop lying to myself. Most of what I like to call "reasons" are just complicated excuses for bad behavior. I tell myself stories that justify questionable decisions. I am aware of this fallacy in my thinkin...

W hen I was a Christian, I was taught to bring my pain, confusion, and doubt to the foot of the cross. “You can be healed,” I was told. “ If you have faith, God will make a way .” But the promised healing never came. When my faith-filled prayers were answered with silence, the reassuring comments of “It’s all part of God’s plan” started to sound like empty rhetoric. For that reason and many others, I eventually left Christianity, carrying a burden of spiritual scaring. Now what? Seek psychological help? Eliminate my magical thinking by actually studying science? I tried those paths, and they did help. However, somewhere along the way, I quietly, curiously stumbled onto the writings of modern and ancient philosophers. I mostly skipped the dry texts presented by academia, being more drawn to contemporary writers who bring philosophy alive. When I think of medicine, I often picture pills, prescriptions, or white-coated professionals poking at problems with stethoscopes. But lon...

“Never give up work. Work gives you meaning and purpose and life is empty without it." – Stephen Hawking In a 2010 interview on ABC World News. Recently a friend was telling me that since retiring, complex  furniture making projects had been filling his time. He was also hoping to reconnect with a former coworker who recently retired. He then asked what I was doing since leaving my job, and I replied that in my opinion I hadn’t 'left" anything. With a smile I said, “ As far as I’m concerned, retirement has promoted me to the leisure class, so now I'm working on self improvement. ” “ I don’t do leisure, ” he responded in a serious tone. I believe in working in order to live, and I diligently did so for 43 years before retiring. However, even lowly work horses are not expected to die while in harness. The lucky ones spend their senior years grazing in a peaceful pasture. A life that is finally able to be relieved of punishing labor, urgent assignments or pressing de...

By Webmdave ~ R eality for my dog is uncomplicated. She understands life to be a series of eating, sleeping, running, sniffing, barking, guarding, trusting some and distrusting others, and above all expressing affection and loyalty to her pack (human family). In short, reality for my dog is displaying the qualities usually associated with a dog. She neither searches for or desires a higher purpose, nor does she fear sickness or death. She does not accumulate possessions and is not afflicted by envy, avarice, or demanding addictions and passions. Beyond just living out her days according to her nature, there is nothing else. She is at peace and content with her lot. Regardless of various differences in appearance, aptitudes and situations, dogs appear to be consistently content with their lives. People, however, are complicated. We believe we are somehow special in the universe and are notoriously discontent with nearly everything in our lives on a regular basis. Just sitting stil...

From a blog I was running in 2002:  Last week was "tech week" for Tony & Tina's Wedding. After long days at work, my whole clan was off to the Andrus Center until past midnight every day. The show finally came together for opening night Friday, and things have been going very well. The crowds are really liking what they see. Wednesday Mom called to tell me that my old Scoutmaster, Reggie Kirk, has passed away. He was 73 and he died in his sleep. His son called my parents trying to get hold of me. Reggie had a last request that included me. When I was 12 years old I was in the Boy Scouts. One of the unique talents that I offered the troop was my ability to play a brass instrument, so I became the bugler. Once a year all the Boy Scout troops would converge on Camp Stigwandish for a week long camping experience and every night I would play taps on my bugle for the whole camp. I never really thought much about it, but it apparently had a big impact on Reggie and his sons....

Nothing new is likely to ever be discovered here. The meaning of life is one of those oft-repeated philosophical inquiries made by certain thoughtful individuals in those societies where at least some of the citizenry have reasonable security, adequate shelter and sufficient food. Once the basic needs are met, some people start to wonder why they exist. I have spent some time pondering that question. However, like most others, the bulk of my life was filled with distractions by such mundane activities such as ensuring my value to society was established and maintained via self education, honing my few talents and exhaustively hard work. Obligations to family and employers consumed most of my youth and then my middle age. Now that my children are well grown and my working days have apparently ended, I have the privilege of a bit of leisure to examine my life. My annual medical exam has been interesting since my retirement. The doctor questions me about thoughts of suicide, alcohol ...

It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot of it. Life is long enough, and a sufficiently generous amount has been given to us for the highest achievements if it were all well invested...  ― Seneca, On the Shortness of Life I retired a couple years ago and people are still asking me what I do with all my time. Responding "I am working on personal improvement" seems to assuage most curiosity. What I am tempted to tell them is I spend my time the same as everyone: living life.  Until recently, my mindset resembled that of my inquisitors. I believed that a person who spends the day playing video games or watching television is wasting time. Further, I believed that if a person isn’t actively pursuing a goal such as career advancement, acquiring a degree, travelling the world, etc., then they are also just wasting time. In fact, spending time doing anything not measurably productive could be labeled a waste of time. Someone I know, when she is off work f...